EXCERPTS & MISCELLANY: SPEAK MEXICAN?

He led me to a barn, where a Mexican man stood waiting for his turn at the shower. "Whole-aah, Toe-moss," he shouted.

The man tugged at the towel he wore like a skirt around his waist and nodded his head in greeting, "Hola, Senor Hobbs."

"You speak some Mexican don't you, Daniel?" Hobbs asked. "Well, by God, I'm learning a few words of my own. A person has to in order to get along in the modern world! You get me going, and I'll speak like a regular Topo Gigio, right, Ringo?"

The dog knelt at the base of the tree, doubling over to lick its blistered anus.

"These are different times we're living in, a whole new set of rules. The kids around here, they think they're too good to work. Only choice left is either trash or Mexicans, and I'll take the stupid Mexicans any day." He prodded me in the ribs, "Watch this. 'Buenos Dios, Miguel.'"

A small, dark-eyed man looked up from his wood splitting, alarmed.

"They spook easy," Hobbs said.

Yes, well, people tend to do that when you come up behind them shouting, "Good God." It's just a habit, I guess.


Excerpt from "Naked" by David Sedaris